I don't do the drawings as a kind of reading. I do them because I want to communicate what I see - and because when I take the time to really look at someone, I always see their light. My artwork reminds me to take that time, as often as I can.
A detailed pastel that's about 16" x 20" takes me about 2 hours to do. A smaller sketch takes me less time. I practice by doing some within a 20 minutes time period. It's hard to do, but it helps me to develop my skills and precision. I have done a few on live television and that's been wild! I've done them at street fairs, which is another experience. I received a few pointers from my friend, Norm Brumm, (a world famous artist), but basically, (for me, anyhow) the only way to get better is to practice.
I used to say that I only draw what I see and I have no idea what it means. In some ways that's true, but I think that I learned to say that as a form of self-protection. I didn't want anyone to worry or feel afraid around me. Seeing subtle energy is a natural ability and I didn't do anything to 'make it happen.'
I didn't really understand that others didn't see this stuff until I was maybe 10 or 11 -- and then I didn't believe totally. But I did learn to keep my mouth shut. I felt ashamed and uncomfortable. I tried to figure out what made me different and "fix myself." I've had to learn to live with the fact that I don't know what made me different and I probably never will. Maybe I am a throwback or something!
I've wasted a lot of my life worrying about how to 'fix myself' or about what other people thought about me and it's ridiculous. I can't make myself stop seeing things any more than a person can change who their biological parents were. It's just not possible.
Last week I was looking at a jacket online with my daughter and without forethought, I said "No, I don't want that one, because it won't go with my energy." My daughter grew up with me, she knows me, but she had never heard me say anything like that before. I think stuff like that all of the time, but I guess I haven't said it a loud much. Which brings me back to my point: I have self-censored way too much. I want to communicate what I experience and this is one of the best ways that I have found to do so.
To get back to the aura...
And the truth is, as nervous as the person might be about me seeing them 'naked,' so to speak, I'm used to it. You are who you are and I really don't care what your secrets are. It's none of my business. It's not that I don't care about other people. I do. I just don't have a lot of expectations about who you are and what you should be like. Everyone is different -- yet we're all the same, in a way. We're all doing what we can to get along.
Your 'scars' - and what is garbage to you - might be what makes you beautiful to me - and to your loved ones. Just like a Crystal, it's the impurities, the fractures and the scars in the crystal that reflects the light and shows all of the beautiful colors of the rainbow. That's why I think of people as living rainbows. Sometimes it takes a little while to see the rainbows under the gray clouds. But when things are just right, and the 'clouds' clear... the light shines through. When I start to make (or allow) a connection to another human being, well, it often takes my breath away.
Anyhow... here are a few of my drawings. I wish I would have taken more photos. I always say that and then I forget! I usually bring my camera and then get caught up in the creative process and forget to take the photo. I am in the process of experimenting with some three dimensional pieces. I am really excited about this! I have so many ideas and I hope to share some of my finished works here in the future.
Click on the small pictures to see larger images
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