A Little Background Information on Sherry
Intuitive or psychic "abilities"
run in my family. Just about everyone, on both my mother's and father's side of
the family, have a strong
"sixth sense" of some sort.
Most of my relatives have had consistent, paranormal experiences, and a kind of intuition that often defies logic.
Some family members have seen and spoken to "Beings" or loved ones after they passed. Some are healers. Others are preachers, in a number of denominations and paths. Some do different types of readings and some have what seem to be past life memories. A few, like my father, are lucid dreamers - adept in using their dreams to find answers to puzzling questions, practical insights - or for other, more esoteric and spiritual purposes.
Etcetera etcetera... My family has all kinds of these abilities. A few of them have spent their lives in service to others, trying their best to use their gifts only out of love. Most of them have passed now.
Other relatives mainly used their abilities for selfish purposes, which never ended well, no matter what they tell people.
Childhood was not an easy experience, at all, for a variety of reasons. As I got older, I became aware that I was different and I struggled to accept myself and find my place in the world. Eventually, in my late teens, I analyzed and criticized myself into the office of a psychiatrist, having a literal nervous breakdown. That sounds kind of funny now, but it wasn't. Not one bit...
As a young child, I didnít know that there was anything different about me. However, as I got older, I realized that most of the people around me, especially my peers, really didnít have the same experience of the world that I had. I started to feel isolated, and grew afraid. I couldn't accept myself and spent a good part of my older childhood, especially my adolescence, in fear of being found out by people outside the family. Within my family, it was already becoming routine to try to get me to "find out stuff" for them. I did what I was told to do, mainly because I was punished if I refused, but I also found out that people get nasty when you don't tell them what they want to hear and I wasn't very good at that. (That still holds true...)
I just wanted it to stop. I wanted to focus on science and go to medical school. How could I do that if I was so weird? I became almost disgusted with myself; I couldn't seem to 'get a hold of myself' and stop seeing things that no one else did; I couldn't always stay in my body. It was worse at night, when I was alone and couldn't stop the intense dreams, or things from "visiting me."
I was sure I was delusional -- probably "crazy" (whatever that meant) and I'd never amount to anything. I learned early that it was hard for most people to 'read' me, and I thought that was great - I was able to hide a lot of my fears. I paid a price for that, however, and I was slowly falling apart, eaten up with anxiety about what was wrong with me.
I think that on the surface I was a fairly normal teenager. I was a good student: a member of the National Honor Society, in my Junior year of High School and was even a one of the school mascot/cheerleaders. I was very active in Rainbow Girls and loved doing community service. But I was also terrified every day and every night that I was losing my mind.
I should add that not everything was scary or awful. A lot of it was very beautiful and instructive.
My dreams were filled with the sights and sounds of other times and places -- and with a different kind of school. I spent what seemed like many hours of my life in dream classrooms, seeing and learning things that were hard to share with the people I knew in my waking life. When I was 'awake' I saw people that others couldn't see.
I still find it interesting and strange that most people can't see what I do, and yet they will often react (unconsciously) to what the 'ghosts' or Angels are saying to them, or react to how the energy moves around them.
No matter how interesting some of
my experiences were, I shoved every experience into the same pile
and called it 'bad.' From the time that I started to realize how different
my perception of the world was, my desire to be "like everyone else" steadily
My Dad, and a few perceptive adults tried to talk to me, but it's difficult for anyone to try and explain the "unexplainable" and I wasn't sure enough of myself to know what I say. Our language has few words to express what I experienced - and I was just too afraid of what would happen to me, if I got into much detail. I told Dad about my dreams and my Guide and some things, but I always held things back. It seemed certain that I was losing my mind and I was afraid that I would end up in a mental hospital.
At the age of eighteen, after a semester and
a half of college, as a psych major, I went to see a psychiatrist.
Naturally, I started out intending to major in Psychology because I was going to fix myself. I
soon realized that I needed an expert. I was having a breakdown.
The first day I saw the Doctor, I desperately told him, "I hear voices, I see things that others don't seem to, and I float out of my body. Give me something to 'fix me' so that this doesn't happen anymore." I begged him to try anything - drugs, even shock treatments, if that would help. Anything, to stop these experiences. I was so convinced that I must be psychotic that when, after extensive testing, the Doctor told me that I was not, I got angry with him and them got scared.
I thought that I had somehow drawn him into the psychosis with me.
I did not believe in "ESP" type things ; I discounted them all as fantasy, delusions or wishful thinking. I didn't want to be crazy like my family.
It took me time before I believed that what he was telling me might be possible. This doctor had a personal interest in psychic phenomena and was knowledgeable about some of the things I told him. He introduced me to other physicians and to grad students who had experience with people who had paranormal experiences. He said that he was interested in finding people who had been committed by family members who found them embarrassing (common in those days) and those who had been misdiagnosed as schizophrenic or otherwise mentally ill, when they were actually experiencing some kind of psychic phenomena. I was on board with that.
He was not as altruistic as he pretended to be, however. He was fascinated by the psychic stuff, and he used me in a variety of ways that were no doubt grounds for malpractice.
However, I have to count myself 'lucky' since his unusual interest in me was the main reason that I didn't get put away in a mental hospital. My father was very angry that I had gone to a 'shrink' and talked about family secrets. Angry enough to try to have me committed, as I had always feared. Yes, it damaged my relationship with my Dad and it took years to mend it.
The doctor put a stop to the legal proceedings, but nothing else stopped. The more I used my abilities, the stronger they became. I went to the Doctor to stop what was from happening... but, it 'got worse.'
I have met many people "like me" over the years, that were not as lucky as I was in the end. I was a kid and when I look back on it now, and I can see that I handed my power over to him and did what he told me to do because I was so scared. I started to trust him a little, and he paid me a lot of positive attention and showed me that I had quite a talent for "intuitive knowing." I ended up working for him for several years as a biofeedback technician and also as an "in-office psychic." This caused some raised eyebrows with his colleagues, but he didn't care. He was interested in results and attention from "the right people."
It was not a healthy or positive experience. In some ways, it may have hurt my more than helped me, but, things eventually worked out.
It took another Doctor, who was not fascinated with psychic phenomena, to really help me to accept that these things are "normal" for me and nothing to be afraid of. He taught me to look past the blanket statement that I made about my life: "different is bad."
During the last forty plus years, I have spent
countless hours working on gaining clarity. Self-discipline could not stop the
experiences from happening, as I had originally hoped, but it has helped me in
so many other ways, including in the business world. I have kept a journal
for many, many years, and through this journal, I came to see that the
information that I receive is solid, practical and positive. I
learned the importance of self-mastery, rather than the mastery of others.
My life hasn't been easy, but then, nothing worthwhile is.
Back then I didn't know anyone else who talked to
Beings, saw auras, dreamed lucidly, etc. The few people I met who did
either had as hard a time talking about it as I did, or were famous
I did not want to be a famous psychic.
I did want to be able to talk about my life with people who mattered to me. It took me many, many years to be able to do this, but it was, as my Dad says, "worth every turn of the wheel to get here!"
Yes, there are still a few people who think I am
evil, crazy, delusional, etc. Oddly enough, they are all people who don't
know me, personally. It's so easy to point the finger at
someone you don't know. Gossip is a hobby for some people.
I happen to think that gossiping is an act of evil, whether you listen to
it, or spread it. I grew up seeing the cruelties that ignorant
people could inflict on people who are "different."
I am not out to argue or change anyone's mind about God or reality. Everyone has their own idea of what or who God is. It is my belief that we don't have to take everything spiritual or religious "on faith." If you ask for assistance, with sincerity, and then, pay close attention for the next few hours, days, weeks, etc., you will receive an answer. It probably won't be what you expected or maybe even wanted, but you will get an answer. I speak in these pages only about things in my personal experience, as that is all that I really can speak about. I urge you to try some of the spiritual exercises for yourself, here or on other web sites, books, or where ever you might find them. Find our for yourself, through your own experiences, that there is more to your existence than what you can touch with your hands or measure, or count. You can't see, touch or count love, but it exists. It doesn't matter one bit what I can do, it only matters what you can do.
How I came to do workshops and write about my
experiences is another story. <G>
Today, I know lots of people who are able to communicate with their Guardian Angels, Guides and Masters and others who see auras and ghosts: I know them mostly thanks to the workshops I facilitate.
I guess we are all crazy in the same way!
I do my best
to follow a path of love, not of power. The path of power is a dead
end. The path of love has no end.
A lot of people tell me that they think it is "cool" to be psychic and wish they were able to see and hear the things that I do.
I am not sure that they would like getting that wish. But, then again, maybe they would have an easier time with it than I did.
What I do know is that being clairvoyant and/ or psychic is not being spiritually "enlightened." It's also not necessarily an indication of a loving nature. One can easily be psychic and not be kind or have compassion for others.
I am not personally interested in developing more psychic powers. I have more than enough to cope with now. I AM interested in increasing my ability to give and receive love more fully.
The purely psychic planes are not a very high vibration - they are barely above the physical plane. The psychic realms soon end - but the "God planes" continue. At that frequency, psychic powers are irrelevant, because only love exists.
A huge part of my life lesson has been learning more about balance and self-responsibility. This doesn't sound very exciting, does it? At first glance, this process may seem slower one than you'd hoped it to be.
However, because this process is steady, and it doesn't shock a person, one can achieve greater spiritual growth, over a shorter period of time, than might otherwise be done. It does includes exciting times of discovery and explosive growth. And drama... I have learned about balance only by going out of balance, over and over again. Eventually, I learned that I didn't like it "way over there" and my behaviors modified.
I have had more "excitement" and intensity in my life, than any dozen people I know. My life is never boring or uneventful. I wouldn't mind a few years of uneventful.
My path includes the understanding that life goes in cycles and that only change is constant. It's only with change do you experience growth.
Learning to let go of expectations and make the most of the things that life brings your way is something that most people would agree sounds like a useful skill.
Mine is also a path of self-responsibility, which has never been a popular concept...
Taking the steps which lead to self-responsibility leads to spiritual freedom.
We get the exact amount of spiritual freedom that we allow the people in our lives. The least amount...
Who is it in your life that you feel the need to control?
Even if you do real well in the control area with most people, you still only get the amount of freedom that you give to that person who irritates the heck out of you.
That doesn't mean that you should let someone else control you either. This path is about balance and self-responsibility - and supporting those qualities in others. It's not about being a victim - or a victimizer. It is about having compassionate detachment for all beings.
Everyone has their unresolved issues; behaviors they are compelled to act out in some way.
If there are people who feel compelled to act theirs out in your life, and if you don't want them to - If it is destructive to your life -- grant them the freedom to act it out somewhere else.